Reflection Time

Hello Everyone:

I'm just taking a few minutes, while the phone updates it's software, to write down a few thoughts. Tomorrow evening, at sunset, the Jewish holiday of Yom Kippur begins. It's a 25-hour period of introspection and reflection. I can wrap my head around that because reflecting on one's past deeds is good for the soul. I also take the time to review my relationships with the people in my life. I ask myself do I want to continue in this relationship?  It's not as easy an answer as you think it might because I have look at how the person treated me and how I treated the person. Chief of which is my relationship to my family. We're not that close with each other, ironically since my sister and her family live nearby. I suppose it's a good thing that we're not over a at each other's house all the time-too claustrophobic. The real work is my relationship with my mom. This is becoming increasingly difficult as she ages and seems to isolate herself more and more.  Another thing I've noticed is that she has age-related  hearing and cognitive issues which she refuses to acknowledge. It's a matter of stubborn pride. She can still manage on her own well enough but I worry about the future. These issues frequently cause misunderstandings that generate hurt feelings. This is not good. I try to be patient but I can't continue. My sister is no help. It seems that she just buries her head in the sand and pretends everything is alright. I have my own issues to deal with, worrying about an aging parent is more than I can handle. The other part of the problem is that mom is so focused on her relationship with the Man in White that she neglects her personal relationships.  My phone is almost ready.  Mom doesn't seem to understand that sitting across the dinner table from someone, carrying on about who knows what, does not constitute a relationship. Truthfully, I know that unless she has some epiphany, nothing is going to change and it's not my job to change her. The only thing I can do is cope as best I can. Unfortunately, it means being a little rude at times: reading at the table and/or listening to NPR in the morning.  Engaging mom in friendly conversation is a hit or miss proposition. Thus, I have to take all that into account when re-evaluating this relationship.