Needs Improvement

Hello Everyone:

Yom Kippur is over for the year. I spent the day reflecting on my relationships and my role in them. I realize I'm the best person to be in a relationship with. I seem to lack all the skills necessary to be a good partner. I lack patience, openness, and I don't care too much the other person. It's like I love my guy yet, I enjoy the time away from him. I sent him a message saying how grateful I am for him being in my life and I meant every single word of it. I love him, that's no lie, yet I also enjoy time away from him.  I like being away from him. I think I just need to find some balance between time away and time with him. The lack of relationship skills is a work in progress. It's not just my relationship with the Brit BF I have to improve on m, it's everyone else too. I have to keep working on being kinder to people, more patient, and not so petulant all the time. That last one is hard because I always feel the need to get my way all the time. So, I have to constantly remind myself that I'm not always going to get my way or be attended to first. Tough stuff but not impossible. So, I just take it one day at a time. If I mess up, I just acknowledge what I've done, make amends, and try to do better. That's all I can do.