Hello Everyone:
I'm still feeling kind of crappy but I stiffened my upper lip and carried on. Who came up with that whole "keep a stiff upper lip" nonsense? I'll have to Google it one day. My ear is getting better, it's draining less fluid but it's still swollen on the outside. Eventually, and that'll heal as well. My hearing isn't affected; I know this because I can hear mom's whining loud and clear. I've using olive oil and Apple cider vinegar for the fluid, both seem to work. The vinegar works really well, although, it burns like crazy. The olive oil is more gentle. In other news, my niece returns from Israel tomorrow night. It'll be nice to see her again, at least for the summer. Mom's already decided to go running over there the first weekend she's home. Me, I'll see when I see her. It's also my teenage nephew's birthday. Again, not rushing over. It's not that I don't want to see anyone, it's just that I don't feel a sense of urgency. I'm sure I'll have an opportunity at some point. I had this random thought about my upcoming UK trip. What do I stand to gain from visiting the Brit BF? All along, I've maintained that I'm only expecting a nice visit to somewhere I've never been to. Yet, I'm thinking that I'll walk away with more clarity on our relationship. He's been planning our future since day one and I'm not there yet. I don't seen beyond the end of the end. Maybe that's shortsighted of me but after the disastrous long-term relationship, I don't put too much stock into the future. Too many disappointments. It's been years since I've seen my abusive ex, I don't miss him, but he left me with such a deep scar that the thought of another long-term relationship is scary. I hope this making some sense. I love the Brit BF a lot but he can be overwhelming at times. Do I see a future with him? Maybe.
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