Over Thinking Again

Hello Everyone: I finally committed to the hiring process at the tutoring center and immediately regretted. Honestly, what choice do I have. I need to work and I can't wait around for the school I applied to reply to me. The first phase is a mock SAT that I may need to retake. The tutoring center expects a near perfect score and, even with preparation, I'm not sure I can do that. Although, if I did get an interview with them and they made me an offer I wouldn't turn it down. I also can't reasonably expect the Brit BF to sign his long desired production deal while he's here. It's not like I would actually benefit from it even he does sign one. I have a feeling that he'll just go back to the UK empty handed with no prospects and who knows when I'll see him again, if at all. I know it sounds very doom and gloom but my nerves are starting to get the better of me. It's like everything is coming up all at once: the tutoring center and the Brit BF. It's like I can't think straight and my stomache is doing somersaults. All of this is layered on to the uncertainity of being let go from the other school. I thought the whole reason why was a little dubious but I can't prove anything and there was no use fighting it because they had their minds made up. Anyway, now I'm looking for a way to get out of the tutoring center. Both the tutoring center and the associate teacher job have their positives and their negatives,but the negatives aren't serious deal breakers. What's getting to me about the tutoring center is the test anxiety. This has been a life long thing for me. I know it's normal to feel anxious before exams and I do my best to prepare for it but I haven't taken a standardized exam in a very long time. I can practice and with some luck, do well enough. I'll be quite honest I really want the associate teacher job because,if it's what I think it is, it would provide me with the hands on experience I want. My plan is to get a hands-on teaching job, apply for the community college certificate program,do the internship component, and get hired somewhere. Maybe right now, my choice is some retail or restaurant job, just someplace where I don't have to think too hard, if at all. I'm thinking too much again. I really need to stop doing that and just do. Knowledge is power, faith over fear.