No Heart

Hello Everyone:

I had a rather nice morning.  Mum had a mid-morning doctor's appointment so Carer Number 2 came early to help her get ready.  That left me with about a couple of hours to myself.  I most definitely enjoyed the time to go running, scroll through my email, and shower almost uninterrupted.  They came home earlier than I thought but, no matter, I got in my shower.  My sister recently said something that genuinely annoyed me.  She came by on Sunday and during the course of the conversation, she mentioned that she was getting tight on money and may have to stop the carers.  Not only did that bother me--I was later able to negotiate for help with the housework in exchange for doing it on my own--what also bothered me was the way she manner she said it.  To me it sounded like "Mum, you're no longer useful to me.  You're too expensive and lived a long enough life.  Please die so I can save the money."  Talk about callous.  I have to admit that elder care is more expensive than infant care but you don't have to be so insensitive, especially to your own parent.  Unfortunately my sister has always been a self-righteous, entitled brat walking around with her nose up in the air, looking down at everyone and everything.  Mum nurtured and supported her interests, took care of her children during her two bout of with Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma and medical residency, cooked her meals, sat at her table, and this is the gratitude mum gets?  Thank you, you've served your function, now die?  I can see how supporting a functionally literate son-in-law whose only marketable skill is making babies (they are cute) is far more important than your own parent.  We're not talking about one of patients, this is her own mother.  Sis has no sensitivity whatsoever.  Save the callousness for the patients.