As expected, mom made another birthday-related suggestion which I promptly shot down. I still have to keep an eye on sis, she and the BIL could still plan some birthday meal. There's no point in explaining, yet again, why I refuse to go along with any birthday celebration. They will never understand the concept of how much they hurt my feelings. Besides that, I refuse to go along with anything that will make their egos feel better. Again, I don't care if I spend the day doing nothing, it's better then having to make some grand public spectacle of myself showing how grateful I am that my own family bothered to remember my birthday and made some token effort. It kind of sounds like my constant refusals could just backfire on me. They don't care one way or the other and neither do I. Maybe I'm just being stubborn. It's just I don't seem to be getting through to anyone about the way I feel. I don't just want "to let it go, forget about it, and move on." For the record, I have moved on from the hurt they caused me over my graduation but I haven't forgotten about it. They refused to acknowledge what they did. To them, my important day was nothing more then an inconvenience and not nearly as major as some brat's over wrought birthday party or his freakin' middle school graduation. If these wasn't enough, mom once again thought I was upset because she goes over to Sis's on Saturday afternoon. I've explained to her, time and again, that I prefer to have some quiet time, home alone. It's like she thinks I need her to babysit me. She accuses me of contradicting myself on he subject- saying I want her gone when I really don't. I just exploded, it's like she has some cognition problem and didn't feel like I was being heard. No, I don't mom or sis planning anything for my birthday because it'll just be a crushing disappointment. Yes, I prefer to be home alone. What part of this statement does she not understand?
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