Mom has been in fine button pushing mode this weekend. First, the haranguing about this luncheon, then yesterday about planning a birthday party for me. I can't wait to see what's next. Once again I told mom that I specifically did not want her or sis planning anything for me because it'll be a disappointment like everything else. Once again, mom told me to finally get over it; when I asked if she new why I reacted so angrily, she replied my graduation. Impressive, she remembered why I was still angry. I've been sitting with this for almost two-and-half years. I know it sounds really excessive but this was a big moment that I wanted to celebrate only to have my feelings hurt and to make matters worse, when I stated how hurt I was, the response I got was too bad, get over it. Talk about callous and insensitive. I mean what kind of family member would rather run errands for some brat's birthday party then spend a couple of hours on a Sunday morning celebrating a milestone event. Then offer to append on to said brat's over blown birthday party weekend. Even worse, is he lack of genuine remorse those people feel over the whole thing. I know I'm denying them the opportunity to make amends but as far as I'm concerned the time for amends is long gone. Whatever they do now is just a lame token effort. I would rather do nothing and be happy then do something and be disappointed, again. Even funnier, mom is trying to lay this major guilt trip on me, per usual, acting like the injured party. The guilt trip will not work and I'm happy that she feels hurt by my meanness. As terrible as it sounds, I'm glad. Now she can maybe begin to understand what it's like for me. If sis and her family are disappointed that there'll be no party, good. Of course mom could still try to behind my back only this time I'm going to really exact some form of retribution. Again, as mean and vengeful as it sounds, I don't care. My milestone event was important to me and I shouldn't had to beg my family to show up.
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