Yesterday the BIL, Minion, and the bf came over for lunch. It was a rather pleasent affair and the mess was too bad. Only one minor disaster, a glass with some food on it plate broke. Oh well. after the meal, everyone passed out-I.e.napped. Mom and I were the only one's still up. A nice time overall.
Right now I'm debating whether or not to reveal to the new guy some information about myself that I don't normally share with anyone. It has to do with the nature of my relationship to my ex. The question centers on how emotionally invested I am in this relationship. The bf knows all about it because he's been there with me. The thing with the bf is that, as emotionally invested I am in this relationship, I still have a sense of detachment about it. My EI with the new guy is not quite as deep, due mostly to the fact that he's going back to the UK soon for an indefinite amount of time. We talk and text all the time. I can tell he has strong feelings for me. It's just I'm on the fence about the relationship. There's the difference in our backgrounds: new guy is a non-Jewish Afro-Brit and I'm is American white Jewish girl. Mom has already gone on record as not being thrilled but I think she's resigned to the fact that she can do anything about it. Also, after my experiences with my ex, I still feel yes need to protect myself from being hurt. I'm the same way with the bf. I don't know what to do. Part of me says don't say anything, he'll be gone soon and may not becoming back. Besides, it's too hard to carry on a long distance relationship. The other part says tell him, be honest. You see I'm conflicted about he whole thing. I wish there was a clear cut answer. New guy is wonderful and he's a presence in my life not hit and run. Yet, I still need to distance myself a little so that I don't get hurt. Maybe if we were more emotionally intimate, I could feel more comfortable opening up more. I'm so confused about the whole situation.
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