The new guy is going home to the UK tomorrow morning. This makes me sad and lonely. He's by the apartment in a little while to say farewell. I don't want him to go or at least take me with him. He has to go back because of family issues and I don't know when'll be returning to the U.S. I really looked forward to seeing him and enjoyed our time together. He filled this void in my heart that lacked affection and attention. I hope that one day circumstances will be such that we can get back together and stay together. It's strange for me to feel this way about someone I basically just met because I'm usually more cautious and detached. The detachment is still there, only because it hasn't progressed to the point where we have to start talking about a future. I'm not so naive as to think that he'll remain loyal, after all, the UK is filled with more beautiful girls than I who are smart and funny. Who knows, one might catch his eye in a big way. I could also meet and fall deeply in love with someone else who is good looking, smart, and funny. The bf could finally get his act together and be more serious about our relationship. Too many what-ifs. One thing is certain is I'll miss the new guy. I know we can stay in touch via email and the social networks but it's not the same as hearing his lovely accent and seeing him daily. Sure there is skype but it's still not the same. I'm just so tired of being alone and having this void in my heart where love should be. I'm just afraid I'll never find it or if I do, I'll be another nightmare like the abusive ex. I can fill my days with activities but beyond that what....
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