Thursday, June 19, 2014

UGH

Hello Everyone:

I'm feeling much better about this interview next Wednesday.  I still don't think I'll end up getting it but at least I can give it a go.  There's no harm in that.  Now for the million dollar question, how am I going to get there?  So far the only viable option is to rent a car for the day.  I don't see my car being fixed in the immediate future.  Now I really want this job, if only to afford a new car.  The bf is more excited about the fact that I got an interview then I am.  He is right about one thing , it's better to to take the interview and give it an honest go then not.  At least my chances of moving on to the next round are better if I sit for the interview then sitting at home moaning.  Besides, I could surprise myself and be surprised.  I still think it's just nothing more then drone work.  The City of Santa Ana doesn't even have a preservation ordinance.  Yes, that's kind of important if a city has preservation of their historic heritage built into their General Plan.  Of course, the flip side of this is that I could end up being part of writing that ordinance.  Wouldn't that be something?!  I don't know, I still feel very ambivalent about he whole thing.  I'm calculating in my head all the consequences of getting this job and having to move down there.  Given my financial mess, I couldn't even afford a cardboard box.  I don't have much faith that things will work out for the good, bad, or indifferent.  Why does everything have to be so difficult?  I think I'm starting to panic and get too far ahead of myself.  At Mom isn't carrying on about the interview.  I just don't want to talk about with her because she'll make me more anxious and probably end talking me out of it.  No, that's not what I want, maybe.  I don't know.  

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