Today I'm feeling better now that the weather has sort of settled into something that resembles autumn. I'm still pounding allergies meds and dumping eye drops to clear up the redness but at least I don't want to crawl into bed anymore. I think now I can handle the family gathering thing this evening. It should be a good time for all, the booze should help, especially the 192-proof liquor. Mom has been staying over at sis's for the forty-eight or so hours and I've been enjoying the quiet time. Even the bf said to me yesterday that I'm more relaxed when mom is not around. I've never really paid attention to this but I suppose it's true. Now that I think about it, yes it is true that when mom is around I do get more tense. I suppose it's due to the fact that she knows which buttons to push and I always have to be on guard. Lately, she's been pushing quite a few buttons. With mom away, I can get things done and do some thinking. I can just relax. Last year, mom and the rest of the family were in Israel for the High Holidays and it was a good thing. I was in the final stages of my thesis and I really relished the quiet. This year, we've spent some of the holidays apart and I've enjoyed the time away from mom. Before she leaves, mom always makes a big fuss over things, especially the food. I guess it's natural for her to make sure I have what to eat but I do reassure her that I can feed and take care of myself. I think she still has difficulty accepting the fact that both sis and I are adults who can fend for ourselves. Just to blow my own for a second, I like to think I'm a little bit more independent minded then sis. Anyway, I'm looking forward to a reasonably good time this evening, especially since the bf will be with me.
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