Natural State

Hello Everyone:

The past two days have been stressful.  Much of the source of anxiety had been mum, as usual.  Monday was a good day but she's been having difficulty sleeping which, understandably have made irritable and a bigger pain in the behind.  So much so that I've found myself in tears in the shower.  Hey if you're going cry, do it in the bathroom like an adult.  I was more upset about wanting my life back than anything else.  It feels like the universe is punishing me for some I did in the past but for more how much longer?  All I want is to be able to read a book and sip my coffee without being bothered.  Is that so much to ask?  I just want all the regular things in life.  I'm not asking for anything out of the ordinary.  I just want the ordinary.  I hate living with a person who only can talk about their ailments and makes me cringe every time I hear my name.  I hate being angry all the time, it's not my natural state.  Really.  Angry and resentful are not native to me.  I'm not sure what my natural state is anymore.  I hope one day to recover it.  When I do recover my natural state of being, then I can begin to explore happy.