Clarity

Hello Everyone:

The Sometime BF had a good conversation about the latest situation with his mum.  He still plans to fully be part of the relationship but right now his priority is his mother.  Understandable under the circumstances.  We probably won't be getting together as frequently as I care right now but that's what it is.  Another thing is he's moving into his mum house.  He lives with a male roommate literally across the street from his mum.  This is a little impulsive on his part.  It's very admirable of him to want to do this but it also seems unnecessary.  However, if that's what he wants to do, then fine. I really can't tell him too much what to do.  He is a very caring and sensitive person, sometimes to the point of  smothering another person.  There have been a few situations, over the past several months, where I've had to tell him to back down.  His mother also is quite capable of doing the same.  I like the way he cares about the people in his life but he needs to recognize when he's going overboard.  Personally, I think that moving across the street to care for his mum is a wee much.  The good is that if anything happens, he's right there.  The bad is it's like he's hovering over her, waiting for her to drop.  My mum does have a good point about that one.  Of course mum has to say something.  She just can't let stuff go.  Anyway, what concerns me is the state of the relationship.  It is good to hear that he doesn't plan to push me away like he did after his father passed away a few years ago.  He ended up spending way too much time in grief and regular therapy.  Okay, who am I to decide how long someone should spend in therapy.  I guess it's just my inner Brit/Euro who isn't into talking about personal issues with a stranger(s).  Back to my previous point, he does plan to make his presence known and stay in communication mostly as welcome break from the stress of caring for his mum.  Right now, she's in good spirits but who knows what will be the case in a few months.  I told him that the door is open to him.  So I'm glad I got some clarity about our relationship.